Hopeless Dreams and Everlasting Memeories
by Chalcedony01
Summary: Sometimes dreams and memories are what keep us going
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: All recognised twilight characters and other twilight centered drama belongs to Stephanie Meyers. Everything else belongs to me. _

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Hi all, I haven't written anything in a while so the writing might be a bit rusty! But either way I hope you enjoy the first chapter I think it might be a multi chaptered story not very long but the longest I've ever published. Anyway I hope you enjoy it.

Happy 2011 may all your dreams come true.

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_**Hopeless dreams and everlasting memories**_

_**Chapter 1  
**_

_**Sam's POV  
**_

I can remember it being a Sunday. The sun was for once shining; it really does in La Push. The clouds were far away and so were all the dramas of the last three months. You and I were finally moving on. You never looked more beautiful than you did on that warm Sunday in summer. You wore a lemon dress, its fabric hugging your curves in just the right way you eyes sparkling with love and happiness. It was Seth's 13th birthday. You decide that he deserved a birthday party because when I left you he was there. He held your hand when I couldn't; he passed you tissues when I caused your tears. He listened to your cries of pain when all of them were caused by me leaving.

You said he was there for you and that someone as pure as him needed more than just a birthday cake. He needed to be celebrated as being one of the most wholesome people you've ever met.

That day was the happiest I ever saw you.

Two months later I imprinted on YOUR cousin. MY Emily.

I remember telling you. It was after the incident. I had mauled her face, destroyed her beautiful face.

Even if I wanted to try and make a choice the guilt it made me stay. So that day at the hospital when I asked you to come outside to talk to me I figured you were the strongest you would survive. I walked you to our bench I hadn't seen you for nearly a week. Your eyes shone with anger and sadness over Emily. I think you knew before even I did. You didn't try to hug me or kiss me even when you sat down, after I had, you sat at the opposite side. You used always side as close as possible, even when we fought. I turned to you and I understood, even if you didn't, even if I could never tell you, I understood I wasn't good enough for you.

"Leah, I..." The words caught in my throat. I didn't want to do this; I could feel Emily inside though waiting for me... "Leah, I think we need to...am I think we need to break up...I'm so sorry Leah but I fell in love with someone else...and...Leah?" I turned to you and you were looking straight at me with nothing... no sadness no anger...you just looked... Softly I spoke one word our word "Lee-Lee?"

All of a sudden you stood up and you broke me right there so softly you let me know you knew...knew what I had done

"Go to Emily Sam, she needs you right now." I heard the break in your voice so small that if I was human I wouldn't have heard it at all.

"Leah..." you had started walking away from me. You got into your dad's beat up truck and drove away. That night I went to your house to see if you were ok but I couldn't see you your now 13 year old brother stopped me at the door. I'd never seen him so angry...he was the boy who always smiled...

"Walk away Sam. You're not coming into this house tonight or any night soon." He stated it so coldly as if he never knew me.

"But Seth I just want to see"...my words were failing my for the second time that day "Is she ok?" I asked softly.

"No, but she will be and if you want to help stay away and Sam ask Emily to stay away too she already chose you" He became a protector for the first time that night, even if he didn't know it I could see the wolf in his eyes...his willingness to protect his family, it shone brighter than any I've seen in a wolf since.

I did what he asked I stayed away and at first I asked Emily to stay away too, it was easier at the start she was recovering from her surgeries and we were getting to know each other. Two months later she moved into my house I came home after a patrol and to the smell of baking muffins in the oven, a clean house and a box by the stairs saying one word. LEAH.

It was then it had hit me what I had done. How 19 years of friendship had been packed away by me in one box. I just threw it away.

"Emily why is that box at the stairs? Wasn't it in the spare room?" I waited for an answer I knew I didn't want to hear.

"I think it's time we visited Leah. Tonight it's Aunt Sue's birthday so my mum asked us to go over I said we would. I saw that box and we'll I thought you might like to give Leah back her things...I mean I know Leah she'll be missing her iPod! I can't believe you haven't dropped it over to her but it'll be a good excuse to talk to her...I think it's time we all move on it's been two months...oh my muffins! Go for a shower Sam we leave in 20 minutes" As Emily ran from the sitting room to the kitchen to save her blueberry muffins from burning I ran to the bathroom. It was there I saw the man I had become I had faced vampires but I couldn't face her. One girl, my girl, my Leah.

Emily was right it has been two months since **we** saw her, it has only been one night since **I** saw her. Even though Seth asked me not to and I didn't approach her...every night I would go the woods outside her house and just lie there and think. Think of the boy I used to be the man I could have been. I saw her looking out the window and I felt she was looking at me as if she knew I was there. Impossible, she's human but Leah always knew me better than anyone else. She still does. Every night since becoming this monster I ran around her house making sure she was safe even the imprint couldn't make me not want to protect her!

How was I going to get through this night? I haven't wanted to see her. To do that I'd have to let go and that was the one thing I was not ready to do even if I should be.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Leah's POV_**

I waited. I thought that maybe you might come back to me. I waited.

Two months. It's been two months since the love of my life and my cousin jumped on the train saying happily ever after as I just waited in the endless ticket line to even get a ticket!

Emily and Sam. Sam and Emily. Together. I've seen it. Don't think they saw me though. They were so wrapped up in each other the rest of the world didn't matter. _**I**_ didn't matter. Tonight though I would see them. Tonight I would have to allow the past stay in the past, kind of hard though when you get this feeling that every night your ex boyfriend is in the woods watching your window. I never seen him but I know he's there, and every night it kills me just a little bit more because for those brief few moments it gives me hope that he'll come back to me and every night that hope is killed when I feel him leave. Leave me.

Aunt Karen asked me if she could invite them, saying it would be nice for the whole family, and now that Emily and Sam were together he was part of their family which made him part of ours. What could I say? He was part of my family long before he was part of Aunt Karen's put she never did see that, she never really ever saw anything past her own children. I couldn't say no, Aunt Karen made Mum happy and for one night I wanted Mum and Dad happy instead of worrying about their increasingly depressed daughter or their son who seems to be going through such a growth spurt that Mum wants to bring him to the doctors. For one night I want them to have fun enjoy themselves and stop worrying about us. For one night.

Oh my god it's 6:00! Party starts at 7:00 but knowing Emily she'll be here in 15 minutes to help with any preparation work that needs to be done. She always liked to feel involved. Deep breaths Leah, you can to this it's just your cousin and her boyfriend (your ex-fiancé), oh god I think I'm dying!

Was that the door bell? Oh my god they're here!

Breathe.

" Seth?" I ran to my brother's bedroom, "Seth, where are you?"

"Leah what are you doing?" At this point I was sitting on the floor with my back to the door. "They're here." I said it so softly that I don't know how he heard me. It was then I felt so weak that my baby brother was trying to protect me from something he couldn't. A broken- heart.

" You don't have to talk to them. I'll tell both of them to stay away. Just remember why you told Aunt Karen they could come okay?" He said this as he hugged me my baby brother was the strongest person I knew and he was here when I needed him. Always.

"Okay, I'm okay. Let's go, Mum and Dad will be waiting." I wiped the tears from my face. I ruffled Seth's hair and took the first step towards my own personal hell. Breathe.

First step. I could smell muffins, blueberry I think, I haven't had a muffins in over three months. I've grown to hate them.

Third step. Aunt Karen's welcome. "Oh Sam, welcome I'm so glad you both came. Oh Emily dear will you put the muffins on the counter, they smell gorgeous, Leah's favourite I presume? You always made them specially for Leah"

Sixth step. Emily's voice. "Is Leah around, Mum? Maybe she needs some help?"

Seventh step. I froze. I saw it a box at the bottom of the stairs. It had his writing but my name. LEAH.

I ran down to the box. My iPod, clothes that I had left at his house, photos...our life together packed away and they brought it here together, today. To give to me.

I couldn't do this. I grabbed my jacket, my Dad's key's and I ran. I thought I heard my name "Leah...wait Leah!" The adrenaline pumping through me I didn't even recognise who was calling me.

I jumped into the truck and I drove to the cliffs. Breathe Leah. I don't know how long I was there an hour maybe but I had to go back there would be a crowd there and now I would have to stop at the shop to pick up something, anything as an excuse.

I walked into my house. My home that tonight became my hell.

"Leah, where have you been? I was worried." My mum's worried face greeted me at the door.

"Sorry Mum, I just went to the shop for some milk..." I think my mother understood because all she said was "Well, put it in the fridge."

As I put the milk in the fridge I could feel him watching me. I knew if I turned around he would be standing right behind me. Sam. I acted the only way I could think of protecting myself.

"What do you want?" The venom dripping off my tongue. He didn't react he just stared. As I walked past him he grabbed my hand. It felt so right so natural that for one second one split second it felt right. Until I heard Emily's laugh. I pulled back my hand turned on my feet built as much anger up in me that I could and calmly looked him straight in the eye and said

"If you ever, ever touch me again I swear to god I will kill you. You are here tonight not because I want you or her here but because it's my Mum's birthday and she wanted her whole family here. You however Sam, you and Em.."

My words were failing me.

"You and Emily are no longer part of my family, so for the night neither of you come near me neither of you talk to me pass it on because I swear to god no bear could do as much damage as I could do!"

I took a deep breath, I put on a big smile and I went out to the crowd I was Leah Clearwater daughter of Harry and Sue Clearwater and this was their night. I would do what I planned when Seth and I planned this night I would be the perfect hostess for Mum and Dad.

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Hi all, hope you enjoyed the chapter review any thoughts on the story so far?


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